In a quiet suburban home, a devoted mother grappled with a heartbreaking dilemma as her boyfriend’s 12-year-old son continued to terrify their three-month-old daughter deliberately. Despite heartfelt pleas and warnings, the unsettling behavior persisted, pushing the mother to a breaking point.
On January 11, 2024, an anonymous female contributor took to the “AITAH” subreddit to discuss her distressing experience. After being diagnosed with postpartum depression (PPD), she questioned its influence on her actions.
The Original Poster (OP) had a six-year relationship with her boyfriend. He also had a 12-year-old son, Jake, and they had been living with OP for the previous two years. OP, who had owned her home for about a decade, was dealing with a difficult situation involving Jake’s actions toward their three-month little daughter.
Despite Jake’s obvious fondness for his sister, an unsettling pattern arose when he intentionally scared the infant. Jake would approach the baby, exclaim, “RA!” and laugh at her shocked reflexes. His laughing would be followed by fake apologies, stating that he didn’t mean to scare her.
This worrisome rhythm occurred at least four times per day, forcing OP to seek help from the internet community, torn between her fears, the probable influence of PPD, and her yearning for a solution.
Despite OP’s constant efforts to stop Jake’s disturbing behavior, including warning him about the potential harm to the infant’s hearing and underlining the lack of amusement in his acts, the worrying behavior continued.
The breaking point came three days ago, when OP confronted her boyfriend and Jake out of exasperation. She issued a stark ultimatum, stating that any such intentional scares will result in eviction, effectively eliminating them from her life.
The decision to take such harsh measures was motivated by the boyfriend’s inconsistent responses. While he occasionally intervened, he rejected OP’s concerns as overreactions. In an attempt to excuse his conduct, Jake said that finding delight in a baby’s startle reflex was a common childhood experience.
OP, struggling with the weight of her ultimatum, vividly recalled the scene, saying, “If he purposefully scared my kid again, then [Jake and OP’s boyfriend] would be evicted.” Despite the severe warning, she felt a stab of sorrow as Jake, sporting a dejected expression, returned to his room.
A night before sharing her story, OP slipped out of the room for a moment, leaving her three-month-old baby swaying peacefully in the swing. Jake used her brief absence to participate in another unsettling experience.
From a distance, OP overheard Jake using a baby voice to urgently question, “What are you doing?” The aftermath was immediate: her daughter’s screaming filled the air. She rushed back, only to hear her boyfriend intervene and try to resolve the matter.
Jake, understanding the gravity of the situation, tried to apologize, attributing his actions to a habit. The boyfriend, on the other hand, argued, downplaying the gravity of the situation. Unyielding, OP rejected their justifications and insisted they go. Her lover, on the other hand, insisted on staying and refusing to leave the house.
Faced with this impasse, OP vowed to leave and have the authorities deliver an eviction notice. Despite the boyfriend’s appeals and assertions that Jake is only 12 years old and cannot be perfect, she departed and took decisive action the next day, filing for eviction.
OP had previously attempted to understand Jake’s motivations for scaring her kid, personally questioning him about his actions. “[He] thinks it’s funny when kids cry,” OP recalled following their talk.
Still, a part of her questioned whether she had done the right thing. “AITA for kicking my BF and his kid out because his son was constantly scaring my baby on purpose?” I questioned the OP.
The OP’s story reverberated over the internet, drawing enormous attention and sympathy from the online community. The majority of people are supportive, with many stating that she made the appropriate decision.
“NTA. Yes. He’s 12. Old enough to know better and avoid doing it. Old enough to follow instructions. Would he appreciate it if you startled him every morning? No. “He’s 12, but he’s being an AH, which sounds almost sadistic,” one user commented.
“As a mother of a 12-year-old, I completely agree that this is not typical for her age. Maybe if he was five or six, but definitely not twelve. They learn after being correct one or two times. The fact that he claims he enjoys making newborns cry is disturbing. “I’m wondering what other behavioral issues he has,” said a second person.
“As the mother of a 4 year old, this [behavior] would only be understandable if Jake was 2 or 3 years old,” quipped a third netizen. “Let your boyfriend get to sleep and then clang a couple of pans together to wake him up. Do this 4x a night or so and see if it changes his mind. His kid is 12. He is old enough to follow rules. This is not just a kid being a kid,” expressed yet another commenter.
Do you support OP’s stance, or do you feel she should have handled the situation differently? What approach would you take if you were in her place?